Valentine's Day is the day when we celebrate romantic love. As librarians we often find ourselves scouring historical newspapers to help our researchers, and we always learn lots of interesting things along the way. On this day of hearts, cards and candy, here are some tips we learned to help those who might be looking for a significant other. 

We have become spoiled in the age of online dating. Really smart people have created algorithms and formulated just the right questions for us to answer and match us with our perfect mate. However, before the Internet people were not so lucky, but they still managed to figure it out on their own.  Reading through old personal ads one can learn a lot about what to do to attract the love of your life using only a few words. Let's look at a few examples.

Want to research more personal ads or events of the past? The New York Public Library offers hundreds of magazines and newspapers online for free! To further your research explore the over 500 online research options available to New York Public Library patrons, many accessible from home with a library card.

1. Be Specific About What You Want in a Mate

We have all heard the old saying, "you won't get want you want if you don't ask." These lonely hearts sisters got it right in their joint personal ad when they specifically asked for men who could "do card tricks" and operate a magic lantern. Let's all take lessons from these ladies.

2. Set Boundaries

It is always wise to be up front and set boundaries with a potential mate. This slightly odd and mysterious note was found in the personal ads section of the newspaper. The author provided little context, but we know that Juan wanted it to be clear that  he was not paying anyone else's bills!

3. Show Your True Self

Social media has made it easy to "catfish" and blur the lines about who we really are. One lesson we have taken from these personal ads is to not be afraid to show your true self. This young lady is very open about her one gold tooth, and she takes pride in the fact that she can recite Gunga Din. 

Of course, when people had serious questions about love they wrote to advice columns. We have all heard of the likes of Ann Landers, but a century earlier there was Mrs. Ruth Ashmore...

In the late 1800s Ladies' Home Journal  was one of the most popular magazines for women. Understanding the influence they possessed, an advice column was created where women could write to the distinguished lady, Ruth Ashmore, and ask questions ranging from the proper placement of the date on a letter to advice about love. The column was called Side Talks with Girls, and was usually placed alongside the corset advertisements. What important advice about finding the perfect person did we learn from Mrs. Ashmore?

4. Be Careful about Sending that Selfie

Did you think sending photos of yourself to someone you are interested in was new? Apparently it was also a thing in 1895, and Mrs. Ashmore had strong opinions on the matter.

5. Don't Flirt with Your Friends' Person

Mrs. Ashmore had strong feelings on this. She explains that you may be more attractive, smarter, and have a better personality than your friend, but don't flaunt that in front of their significant other. Here is her full explanation.

And finally, a message from Dear Abby:

6. Never Give Up on Love

Many people in this world are perfectly happy living the single life, but if love is something that you desire this letter in the Dear Abby column shows us to dream big and don't give up! Even if your dream is to get married on the moon.

If you would like to explore these papers on your own, just stop by the library and makes sure you to get your New York Public Library Card! The articles were found in the Women's Magazine Archive and Newspapers.com. 

As a bonus, if you are would like to spend Valentine's Day  curled up with some short love stories, explore the American Antiquarian Society Historical Periodicals Collection database. In this online resource you can read wonderful stories in collections such as, Women's Periodicals of the Nineteenth Century, 1845-1865; American Literary Periodicals, 1859-1891; and Story Papers, Dimes and Dollar Periodicals, 1828-1877.

Resources

Art and Picture Collection, The New York Public Library. "On Valentine's Day." The New York Public Library Digital Collections. 19--.  http://digitalcollections.nypl.org/items/510d47e3-faf0-a3d9-e040-e00a18064a99. Image ID: 1600892.

Ashmore, Ruth. "SIDE-TALKS WITH GIRLS." Ladies' Home Journal 02 1892: 16. Women's Magazine Archive database. 25 Jan. 2019. 

Ashmore, Ruth. "SIDE-TALKS WITH GIRLS." Ladies' Home Journal 04 1895: 33. Women's Magazine Archive database.  25 Jan. 2019.

"Personal Advertisements." Oakland Tribune 11 09 1928: 49. Newspapers.com database.  25 Jan. 2019.

"Personal Advertisements." Oakland Tribune 11 09 1928: 49. Newspapers.com database.  25 Jan. 2019.

"Personal Advertisements." The San Bernardino County Sun 12 16 1977: 68. Newspapers.com database.  25 Jan. 2019.

"St. Valentines Day." Godey's Lady's Book & Magazine 02 01 1864: 110. American Antiquarian Society Historical Periodicals Collection database.  25 Jan. 2019.

Van Buren, Abigail. "Dear Abby: I Want to Get Married Underwater." Ladies' Home Journal 06 1968: 83,83, 107. Women's Magazine Archive database. Web. 25 Jan. 2019 .